


Family Ties

by MyrJuhl



Category: British Actors RPF
Genre: Adult Content, Angst, Drama, GSA syndrome, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Character Death, Romance, Sibling Incest, light kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-24
Updated: 2014-07-08
Packaged: 2018-02-06 02:08:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1840411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyrJuhl/pseuds/MyrJuhl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At his dad’s funeral, Tom meets someone he never thought existed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Funeral

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** These events absolutely never happened. This fic is for entertainment purposes only, not profit. I, the author, make no claim through this work as to the fictitious characters/ actual lives/ preferences/ activities of the people mentioned herein. 
> 
> **Author's notes:** Regarding Hugh and Tom’s careers, I’m not following the timeline 100%.  
>  This story is rather wordy... hope you’ll enjoy it nevertheless ☺

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The call came that morning.

A few days ago, Tom and his family had visited his dad at the hospital. Tom knew it was the last time he'd see his dad and the departure had been very sad. He was still sad but he'd done mourning. His dad had been ill for a long while, and Tom had had time to work through his sorrow. He had to admit that his dad's death came as a relief. That he was finally at peace and no longer suffering. Calling the rest of the family on behalf of his mother, had been understood. Tom was now the head of the family – even if he was barely twenty-two years old. The responsibility lay heavily on his shoulders. His dad’s lawyer had already called, too. As soon as the date of the ceremony was set, Tom would be called to attend a meeting to discuss other matters regarding his dad’s will.

Tom was the only one of his siblings to attend that meeting. That aspect was incredibly unsettling, since his dad had already divided his estate amongst his children when his parents divorced in 1994. There should be nothing to inherit. Throughout the years, Tom had received small things such as old letters and documents concerning his granddad and even great granddad, who had died in the Battle at the Somme in World War 1. Tom was named after that brave old fellow. Tom had always loved his parents equally. But at the same time, he had mixed feelings regarding his dad. When he was thirteen, they divorced. The classic tale of him finding another woman. 

Tom was sent to Eton College. A prestigious all boy school and he struggled to fit in while at the same time struggling to handle his anger towards his parents. He understood his parents had always prioritised sending their children to good schools. But it collided on the year he was sent to Eton. That it happened again right before he was sent off to board with Eton. Away from them battling their divorce. They were probably right on some points, but going through puberty at Eton was not the same as having your parents around whom you could ask for help if you had difficult questions... like he'd discovered that he was gay. So Tom had had a lot on his plate in his school years.

There had been a surprisingly lot of boys from broken homes like Tom’s in Eton at the time. And common for all of them was that no one talked about their feelings to the teachers or amongst themselves. There was no one Tom felt comfortable enough to talk to about his feelings.

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The funeral was to be held on a Wednesday. There would be no burial afterwards because James Hiddleston had donated his body to science. It was tough on the family, but they respected his wishes and would have a small ceremony putting a small stone on the ground on the cemetery close to Diana's home at some point later. Tom hadn't had the energy to date anybody for six months at least. His dad's rapidly yet unsteadily declining health had sucked out all the energy of Tom. He only managed to concentrate on his drama classes. Hopefully, he would be able to pick up his social life very soon. He missed it much more than he'd been aware of.

He kissed them all on the cheek and checked his watch, feeling a little anxious. All the details he’d had to ascertain these few days had worn him out physically and emotionally. Now he had to admit that all he really wanted was to get this over with, and finally succeed at better concentrate on his drama studies at RADA.

His sisters were doing their best to keep their emotions in check, because it was clear that their mother wasn’t going to be able to. “We’re getting late,” he nudged them gently but winced inwardly. He didn’t like to push them, but he really needed to get out of the house. Thankfully, they got a move on and, shortly after, they were on their way to the chapel.

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“Who are they?” Emma asked. The Hiddleston’s sat on the first row to the left. On the opposite row another family sat, obviously grieving as well.

“I don’t know, darling,” Diana answered her daughter, “I’ve never seen them before in my life.”

Tom stole a closer look. There was a woman his mother’s age and three other people on the bench – most likely her children. Two sons and a daughter of Tom and his siblings’ ages.

“Stop staring!” Sarah whispered. “It’s rude.”

“Just wondering what the connection is,” Tom muttered.

“Perhaps they’re having a sermon of their own?” Emma suggested.

“No. We’re the only sermon today. I checked with the vicar when I scheduled the date, because I didn’t want to handle other people’s grief on top of our own on this day,” Tom replied.

All four Hiddleston’s checked the other family out. This was getting interesting. The other party politely nodded to them when they realised they were being watched.

Diana sat back and she looked a little stressed. Tom didn’t ask her why she was so spooked all of a sudden, but he did notice that one of the sons had looked particularly back at him.

After a few seconds, Tom couldn’t help himself. He had to take another look. Of course, he noticed right away that the man looked beyond gorgeous. He was ridiculously suntanned for this time of the year, and Tom swallowed as he realised he was fantasising of licking that golden skin to feel if it tasted differently. Wow – he didn’t even know the guy. He had green eyes for as much as Tom could tell from his quick glances when the guy looked back at him, just as curious. He had honey coloured curls... just like Tom, perhaps a shade or two darker, and the young drama student found that incredibly arousing. He had to sit very still all of a sudden, because he was getting a hard on. What a fucking inappropriate experience on a time like this when he had a rare opportunity to wear the Hiddleston tartan. However, he couldn’t help it and moaned lowly in a mix of mortification and absurdity, as he discretely pressed down on his sporran to cover up his developing problem.

“It’s all right, Tom,” his mother said and clapped his arm.

Tom jerked and then he had to suppress a nervous giggle because luckily, she’d completely misunderstood. Then he forced himself to concentrate because the organ had started playing and sopranos sang a few hymns. The vicar gave his speech to Tom’s carefully crafted notes and all in all, it was a beautiful sermon commemorating his dad's life. There were many sniffles expressed around him, but Tom found he literally had no tears left. Now he just wanted the meeting with the lawyer to be done, and then he could drive everyone home. Tomorrow would be different. No more risks of getting a call in the middle of the night that his dad might be about to die... and then he didn’t and so the past two years had gone by. Two years was a long time to live on the edge of sorrow and relief. 

It was time to carry the coffin to the hearse waiting outside. Tom had calmed down by that time and was able to stand up without making a spectacle of himself. 

To everybody’s astonishment, the males from the other row got up, too, and motioned to help carry the coffin. Confusion was written on Tom and his siblings' faces but after a tight nod from his uncles, Tom understood that that was already arranged. The two strangers were supposed to take two of the six handles along with Tom and his uncles. Tom was careful not to look at his mother. This was getting his adrenaline rising, and he shook all over his body when the coffin was safely inside the car. 

The hearse left the church area and then there was awkwardness because there hadn’t been arranged any funeral feast afterwards. His mum, his dad's brothers and families just wanted to go home and Tom and his sisters hadn’t insisted on arranging something without the others. All in all, a very deflating experience.

Diana was shaking everybody's hands until there were only the strangers left. Respectfully, it seemed as if they waited to approach them as the last ones and, when they did, they were reluctant.

Tom's eyes rested on the tanned bloke as he reached out his hand to shake Tom's. Gods, his smell was overwhelming, and Tom had to stop himself from inhaling his scent.

His mother spoke to them and interrupted Tom's inner dialogue.

"Thank you for coming. I don't recall meeting you, Mrs...?" Diana asked.

"Miss Dancy. Sarah Ann Dancy," the mother responded, as she shook Diana's hand as ladylike as Diana shook hers, their palms never connecting.

"So," Diana said silkily. "You _are_ James'..."

"Yes. We were engaged in 1974... then he met you, Mrs. Hiddleston."

Tom and his sister looked at each other and then at the woman.

"Oh, my god," Tom’s sister Sarah said and pressed her hand to her mouth. Their mother was surprisingly cold as she watched Miss Dancy.

Gradually, Tom understood a few things himself. They'd always known that their dad had had a long term engagement to another woman when he married their mom in 1978. But they didn't know the name of the lady, because to their dad that part of his past had always been a closed book.

The reasons for his secrecy was standing in front of them. Flesh and blood.

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The lawyer suddenly stood next to Tom.

"Tom? Hugh? Are you ready?"

Tom looked at the guy - Hugh - but his face was grim and serious now. Tom's skin still tingled from Hugh's touch. His hand had been pleasantly dry and surprisingly smooth. His grip strong and friendly. Tom tried to concentrate on what Mr. Pritchard was saying when his mother interrupted.

"I'm terribly sorry Tom, but would you mind taking a cab and let Sarah drive us home in your car?"

"I need to change..."

His mother handed him the bag of clothes he'd taken along. Tom looked down at himself. His knees were naked under the rim of the kilt. Sighing he nodded, "Of course you can." He opened his sporran and picked out the car keys. "Here. I'll come back and get it when I can."

"Thank you darling," his mother said and kissed his cheek. Tom sighed. He wasn’t in the mood for a cab but he obliged as always. 

"Take care, mum," Tom said, as he saw his family leave. Then he looked at Mr. Pritchard and Hugh. "Would you mind if I changed into street clothes before the meeting?"

Mr. Pritchard nodded. "Of course not, Tom. I believe there is a bathroom close to the entrance. We'll wait for you."

Tom quickly glanced at Hugh and perhaps it was his imagination, but he was almost sure the guy had just turned his eyes away the way you did when you didn’t want to be caught checking out someone. 

Tom's face heated a little at the thought but he just hurried inside the chapel to change into his jeans. He decided to keep the shirt and jacket on. It didn’t look too bad with the jeans. The laced up dress shoes were odd, but he hadn't thought of bringing a second pair. The jeans would hide the laces. 

When he came out of the bathroom, the other men were waiting for him and together, they headed for the office that was lent to them so they could conduct their meeting right away.

Tom followed behind, distractedly rubbing his hair and looking at Hugh's fabulous arse. He had to stop this train of sexual thoughts. It was hard enough to keep his arousal slowly burning without adding to the fuel.

"Here we are," Mr. Pritchard said when they found the office and opened the door to let the two young men enter. "Please have a seat."

Tom and Hugh sat down in the chairs placed in front of the desk. 

Mr. Pritchard put his briefcase on top of it and took out an envelope. Setting his briefcase aside, he sat down and folded his hands. 

"Gentlemen. This conversation will change your lives. I wish you the best of luck," Mr. Pritchard said formally and put on his reading glasses.

Tom exchanged a worried look with Hugh and they both sat up straighter.

Mr. Pritchard opened the envelope and picked out a letter.

“I, James Norman Hiddleston, of 2 Chalfont Rd, Oxford OX2 6TH, London, United Kingdom,

Hereby declare this to be an under part to previous wills or testaments writings made by me.

To my son Hugh Michael Horace Dancy...”

Tom gasped. "What?"

"Tom... please," Mr. Pritchard said looking over his reading glasses.

Tom exhaled and covered his mouth with his hand.

Mr. Pritchard continued. "...I always knew you loved my motorcycles and therefore I'm giving you the Moto Guzzi. Your brother John Christopher Dancy and sister Katharine Sarah Redman can have any other bike they might wish."

Hugh covered his mouth, too.

"Congratulations," Tom said tonelessly.

"Don't. We only liked the bikes because dad enjoyed them so much..." Hugh said, and his green eyes became bright with unshed tears.

“I nominate my son Thomas William Hiddleston to be the Executor of my father’s Cottage in Cornwall. Should he be unwilling or unable to act as executor, Sarah Alexandra Hiddleston or Emma Elizabeth Hiddleston will be the next nominated in this order.

‘I love all of my children equally. In witness whereof, I have signed this will in London on the 1st of February 2003 in the presence of the undersigned witnesses who in my presence and in the presence of each other have signed this will as witnesses.”

“That’s very recent,” Hugh said.

Tom pushed his hands under his armpits. He had no words to say right now, and still his mind was racing a hundred miles per hour. 

Mr. Pritchard closed the letter and took off his reading glasses. 

"That’s it?" Hugh asked. "Tom or _his_ sisters get the old cottage and Jack and I get a bike?"

Mr. Pritchard shook his shoulders regrettably.

"I'm sorry boys, but this is it. Your father divided his estate a while ago. I'm sure you all benefitted from it back then. This is simply a specific wish for handling over items that he wanted to share with you two. I’ll be in touch. Have a good day." Mr. Pritchard got up and shook their hands.

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"I always knew I'd get the cottage," Tom said when they stepped outside. "When dad divided his estate - when he and mum got divorced, he always implied he wanted me to have granddad’s cottage. I visited my granddad there a lot in my teen years, during vacations and such with my siblings and cousins because I felt granddad was the only one who had time to listen."

"I never knew my paternal grandparents. Dad never took us to see them. I honestly always thought they were dead."

"I'm sorry," Tom said.

"Doesn’t matter now. At least I had my mum’s parents in my childhood," Hugh said and stuck his hands into his pockets. "Where are you headed?"

"Home. I'd better call a cab."

"I could take you, Tom. Maybe we could go for a coffee? Find a place and talk some more. I feel like the questions are cueing up right now."

"You’re absolutely right. Thanks. I wouldn’t mind a lift," Tom said and followed Hugh toward his car. "How old are you?" he asked him. 

"Twenty-seven? You?"

"I'm twenty-two just now. Three weeks ago."

"Many happy returns, Tom," Hugh said with a little smile.

Tom nodded a thanks and checked his bag.

"Was that the Hiddleston tartan?" Hugh asked.

"Yeah. The happy red clan colours – mind you it’s actually the Galloway clan colours. Hiddleston’s are just under their district," Tom said, “You never?" he indicated if Hugh had ever worn the clan kilt.

"No. I never associated myself with my Scottish heritage."

Tom shrugged. "Let's leave, shall we?"

"Sure."

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Sitting in Hugh’s car wasn't really awkward. Talking together seemed to come easy.

"So brothers?" Hugh said with a small smile.

"Yeah, apparently," Tom replied.

"How's the age difference between you?"

"Sarah is the oldest..."

"Sarah?" Hugh interrupted.

"Yeah..." Tom realised what Hugh was hinting at. "It would seem that dad had her named after your mum, wouldn’t it?"

Hugh pressed his lips together tightly.

"Don't laugh," Tom said, laughing himself.

"I know," Hugh smiled. "It's just really interesting where his mind took him. That he thought it was perfectly all right to your family that he had his first born with your mum named after my mum."

Tom nodded, agreeing totally. "Anyway... Sarah was born in 1979. I was born in 1981." Grinning at Hugh, he added, "I'm named after our paternal great granddad and my maternal granddad. Then Emma was born in 1986."

Hugh sighed. "Then you're really not going to like this, Tom. Kate was born in 1980."

Tom gasped. "And dad is her dad?"

"Oh, yes. He most certainly is."

"So... Dad got your mum pregnant with Kate _after_ he marred my mum... and _after_ Sarah was born?"

Hugh looked straight ahead when he said, "Your mum was pregnant with _you_ , when Kate was born, Tom."

Tom looked positively ill at the thought of how eager his dad had been to fertilise the women in his life repeatedly. "It's unbelievably. That...” He stopped himself before he expressed vocally what he thought about his dad right now.

"Tom... He loved us all equally. Don’t ever forget that I should be as offended towards you lot than you are right now."

"I'm not offended toward you guys," Tom said. "I'm just amazed and perhaps also disgusted that he thought it was all right to make two women believe they were both the loves of his life.”

"Tom... they _were_ the loves of his life. He just gave himself the luxury not choosing between them."

Tom still looked miffed. 

"Anyway. Jack was born in 1977."

"So before he married my mum."

"Yes. But he was engaged to her."

"Why did she let him come back after he divorced my mum?"

"Love is blind, Thomas," Hugh said softly.

“If you don’t mind, could we have that coffee at my place?” Tom said and buried his fingers in his hair and closed his eyes.

“Sure. You’re all right?”

“No... I’m not. I was sent to boarding school at Eton at thirteen, while they were divorcing. It was so distressing. And then...” Tom laughed a little helplessly and looked at him, “...he just went back to your mum... and I was so fucking alone back then. Literally.” 

“What’s the address?”

“Blackburn Road, West Hampstead.”

“Got it,” Hugh said and then he shrugged. “You know... dad sent me to boarding school, too, when I was thirteen.”

“Where?”

“The Winchester College.”

“Really?” Tom asked. 

“Yes.”

“I came directly from The Dragon School in Oxford and had been really happy there...”

“What?” Hugh said. “ _I_ went to The Dragon School in Oxford, too!”

Tom gaped at Hugh who was literally gaping back at him. “Watch the road, Hugh,” Tom said quickly.

“We went to the same school?”

“Nobody ever mentioned we had the same dad,” Tom said. “Did Jack go there, too?”

Hugh shook his head. “No neither he nor Kate. And now we know why. They’d have run into Sarah and you, wouldn’t they?”

“Sarah didn’t go to the Dragon. Emma did. But that’s years later.”

“I grew up in Newcastle before dad... moved to London obviously to live with you guys.”

“Yeah. I grew up in West End... If you don’t count the boarding schools.”

“We’ve been circling around each other in a way without ever having had the opportunity to know each other.”

“I can’t understand why he didn’t simply admit everything to his families and let _us_ know we had brothers and sisters...” Tom swallowed and dropped the subject. There was no one he could point his disappointment and resentment towards. Knowing that Hugh felt the exact same way helped. “I’m so pissed off right now.”

“Don’t tell your mum these things. At least not yet,” Hugh said.

“I never tell the olds anything to be honest. I mean I never did. Sending your kids to a boarding school... it really sends out the message that they’re too busy to be interested in what’s going on in your life. You’re on your own. That’s what I felt anyway. I got used to keeping things to myself and boy did I keep things to myself. They seemed to like it that way, too.”

“I felt the same way,” Hugh said. “I only became interesting to my parents when I became a grown up.”

Tom looked at him and an intense connection of mutual understanding was exchanged between the two half brothers.

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	2. Restoration

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“It’s at the end of the street,” Tom said when he saw they were getting closer to his address.

“What happened after Eton?” Hugh asked, as he parked the car in front of Tom’s home.

“I’ll tell you when we get up,” Tom said and got out of the car. Watching Hugh lock up the car, Tom added with a little smile, “Not that every part of my childhood was fucked up.”

“No, but those are the things that worked. You’re never in conflict with those experiences. It’s the ones that were fucked up you have to deal with, and so they tend to take up a lot of space in your... anger division?” Hugh suggested.

Tom sighed and led the way into the building.

Shortly after, Tom let them inside the flat. “It’s not much but it’s home,” he said as Hugh passed him.

Hugh just smiled and stepped into a very cosy one-room student flat. “Studying?” he concluded.

“Drama. At RADA.”

“Really?” Hugh said. Somehow, they’d carefully deluded the subject of their occupations. “You’re studying to become an actor. After all this careful honing?”

Tom smirked. “Well, I hope to become one. It’s not as if mum and dad disapproved. Mum’s a stage designer and dad always loved the theatre. I’ve always loved the classics, Shakespeare.”

“Are you any good?” Hugh asked, took off his coat, and dropped it on Tom’s bed. He’d noticed Tom’s bookshelves and sauntered over there. 

Tom watched him as he swallowed. Hugh’s shirt was unbuttoned three buttons down, and the skin on his collarbones was so beautiful that Tom had to close his eyes to contain the temptation of kissing that smooth tanned patch. 

“Tom?” Hugh asked when Tom didn’t answer. He fingered the spines of some of the many books that grabbed his attention. 

“I hope so,” Tom said and rubbed his neck self-consciously. He had to get out of his coat and quickly hung it on the rack behind the door. He still held the bag with his kilt in his hand and had to put it away in the closet. The last thing he needed was not being able to find it again next time he had to wear it... which was usually never. Finally, he came to stand next to Hugh.

Hugh had watched him with an amused smile. He pulled out a random book and Tom couldn’t restrain it any more.

“Why are you so tanned?” he burst out. Closing his eyes in shock, he couldn’t believe he actually asked Hugh. “I’m sorry... I...”

“I just got back from the Maldives. Sunshine every single day. I’ve been shooting a film the last three months. Just got back last week.”

“Oh!” Tom gushed in surprise. “No. Fucking. Way!”

“I know it’s ridiculous.”

“And we’re both actors!” Tom concluded. It really was ridiculous. “Why were we even separated!”

“Yeah. It’s ludicrous.”

Tom got really excited for a completely different reason and, keyed up, he dug into the new topic. “Where have I seen you?”

“I’ve been in the usual stack of BBC series... but I’m particularly proud of ‘Black Hawk Down’...?” Hugh said, and lifted an eyebrow to leave Tom space to recognise what movie he was talking about. “Seen that one?”

Tom frowned and pressed his lips together. “You were in that one?”

Hugh nodded.

“I saw that one. There were a lot of hot... ho... great actors.”

Hugh smiled but didn’t comment on Tom’s slip. “Lots of incredible talent. But I’m not holding it against you that you didn’t notice me. My face was mostly covered in war paint.”

 _Hot..._ Tom thought.

“We sweat buckets. Had to do boot camp training prior to get a grasp of what we were filming. Let me tell you... Africa is scorching warm.”

“Who was your character?” Tom asked.

“A medic.”

“ _The_ medic?”

“Who had to try and locate a vein in the thigh of someone bleeding to death, yeah.”

Tom frowned. He’d never forgotten that scene. Who’d have known that the medic was played by Hugh? 

“I got suntanned there, too,” Hugh said.

They looked at each other, or rather; Tom drank him in with his eyes, desperately trying to rail in the admiration he feared would be palpable in his face. 

Hugh’s eyes slid away, and he put the book back on the shelf. “About that coffee?” he prompted.

Tom sighed and led the way to his tiny tea kitchen. Hugh followed him.

“Why did you get to be so tall?” he asked with a chuckle of envy. “You’re at least ten centimetres taller than me.”

“You’re not that short, Hugh,” Tom replied as he began fiddling with the coffee master he’d gotten for his birthday a few weeks ago.

“I know. I know,” Hugh said as he leaned against the counter watching Tom handle the smart machine. “I’m the average height to the average leading actress.”

“Girls?” Tom said nonchalantly, not looking at Hugh.

“Yeah. Girls. Are you gay, Tom?” Hugh asked.

Tom laughed. “Wow... yes, well, I thought... that... um...” Railing in his tongue yet another time, Tom had to remember that the gorgeous man next to him was his brother now. It didn’t make his attraction any easier. His body still thrilled when he looked at him or when he caught the man’s scent.

Hugh was unimpressed by Tom’s stammering. “I was just curious.”

“I gathered... that,” Tom said, feeling how his cheeks betrayed him by blushing furiously. “I take it it’s a point where we’re not alike?” he dared asking.

Hugh laughed delightedly and Tom felt silly now. “I’m sorry... I hardly know you. I do apologise...” Tom began even though Hugh had had the gall to ask him directly.

Hugh smiled kindly and said, “I have many gay friends. I’m rather bad at holding back questions I want to ask. Just tell me to back off, all right?”

Tom bit his lip. “You could tell?” he asked, “So you’re ...?” Tom laughed self-consciously again; his tongue was really doing its utmost to speak ahead of him and not think straight. “Perhaps we could just drop the subject? Always drove my parents nuts when I stuck my foot in the middle of it.”

Hugh asked. “How do you like your family? Over all, I mean?”

“Well, in spite of everything... I love them dearly. I love my dad, too – I loved him very much even if it was rather chaotic from time to time. Especially towards the end – which wasn’t his fault of course.”

Hugh raised his eyebrows. “I never got to visit him at the hospital the last time.”

“I’m sorry,” Tom said quietly. “He was in and out of that hospital in what seemed liked forever.”

“Yeah – I’m not sure your mum knew all the times my mum took him.”

Tom swallowed. “She actually never took him. I did.”

Hugh put his hand on Tom’s back, and Tom had to suppress a surprising shudder of grief that apparently was still manifested inside his chest. “I don’t want to cry anymore.”

“We don't get to bury him, Tom.”

“I know. That’s what he wanted and we’re respecting that. But Gods... I just can’t get over this double life he’s led all the time.” Looking at Hugh he asked, “You really didn’t know about us?”

“No. Just as you didn’t really know anything about us either. When he began to come back into our lives... I suspected he had obligations of some sort. I wasn't a little kid anymore and snippets of their conversations seemed odd. I just never in my dreams imagined they might be talking about other children of his. I’m wiser now.”

“Your mum knew?”

“She must have.”

“And she didn’t say anything?”

“No. And I never asked.”

“Because that’s how dad wanted it?”

“I don't know, Tom.”

“And he got your mum pregnant after Sarah was born? It’s just so...” Tom tried not to repeat himself constantly, but it was difficult when he also felt so much anger. “He named Sarah after your mum. Suggested that name to my mother’s face. And she never suspected it.” Tom pointed at Hugh, “Or imagine she suggested it and the surprise dad must have felt? How funny that must have seem?” He cocked his head. “Why did he leave your mum for my mum when clearly, he still wanted her?”

“My mum cancelled the engagement probably because he’d gotten your mum pregnant,” Hugh proposed.

“Yeah,” Tom said.

“Still, he came back. I remember vaguely the time when that became regularly. Jack and I were thrilled but there was an incredibly large amount of tension.”

“Yeah, I don't miss that.”

“They divorced in 1994.”

“That’s when he really became a regular in our house. But I was nine-teen, so it didn’t really matter to me. I was busy at Uni and ready to start my life.”

Tom smiled and Hugh smiled back.

“Oh, I think the coffee is more than ready now!” Tom said.

The two men made their coffees to their preferences and took them to the couch.

Tom got out of his dress shoes and sighed. “Should have done that from the start,” he said.

“Can’t be that comfortable,” Hugh said.

“It’s not that bad. Just rarely use them obviously.” Tom folded his long legs under him and got comfy on the couch.

“So what do you like to do?” Hugh asked and sipped carefully at his mug.

“What... In my spare time?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, obviously I like to read. And I’ve taken up yoga.”

“Bit of a Buddhist?”

“No, not really. I just relax that way. I’m always making myself too busy. Helps with the stress I’ve been through, and makes it possible to concentrate better.”

“Makes you more flexible?” Hugh suggested looking over the rim of his mug with humour glinting in his eyes.

“Yeah – I’m getting better at multitasking...” Tom stopped talking when he realised it wasn’t that kind of ‘flexible’ Hugh was insinuating. Grinning softly, Tom said, “Seriously, Hugh.” 

Hugh smiled widely. “But you are... flexible?”

Tom was blushing furiously now. “All right, I am flexible. Though not the kind where I can hook my foot behind my neck.”

“But wouldn’t that be a neat trick, when you...” Hugh waggled his eyebrows suggestively. “You know.”

Tom couldn’t help but smile. In fact, his cheeks were almost hurting from all the smiles this afternoon. It felt good. “I’ve been told I was... occasionally.” Then he cleared his voice. “Gods... can we talk about something else?”

“By all means,” Hugh said and took a sip of coffee.

“What are you working on now?”

“I’m signed up for a costume part. ‘Arthur’.”

“Original tale?”

“Yeah. I’ll be playing Galahad.”

“The Chaste?” Tom joked.

“No. These guys won’t be banging coconuts, I assure you. I’ll be taking bow lessons.””

“How exciting. I looove stage fighting classes. Man I envy you so much,” Tom said. “Mind you, I love all the theatre I can get my hands on at RADA, but filming. That’s an entirely different thing.”

“It is cool. I’ll be filming with Clive Owen,” Hugh said and ticked the bloke off on his fingers, “Ioan Gruffudd, Mads Mikkelsen, Ray Winstone!”

Tom saw pictures of most of the guys march by before his inner eye. “Lots of riding, too, I imagine?”

“Lots of riding.”

“Do you ride, Hugh?”

Hugh didn’t answer but let the unintended innuendo stay in the air between them. This time, however, it didn’t faze Tom.

“I’m looking forward to doing real theatre outside of RADA.”

“You don’t consider RADA’s productions ‘real theatre’?”

“Well, as long as I’m not a bonafied actor with his degree in his hand, you know...”

“Thomas... If people are actually paying to come and see the plays you’re in – that means they think you’re bonafied aplenty.”

Tom had to acknowledge that he had a point. “How did you come about acting then?”

“Well, I went to Winchester College at thirteen, like yourself. I felt rather alone myself, Tom. I was bored. I rebelled. Drank, smoked, you name it and I did it. One of my teachers got so frustrated with me he sent me to the school theatre. I had no interest in acting, but what do you know? I loved it.”

Tom’s mouth gaped. “Okay. I didn’t do any of those things. I find it hard to imagine _you_ doing them.”

“I know. You were probably too nice.”

Smiling, Tom shrugged. “What can I say? I’m a nice guy.”

Hugh put his hand on Tom’s knee. “Yes, you are, Tom. A very nice guy.” Tom held his gaze for a while before Hugh put his mug on the coffee table.

“I studied English Literature and Language afterwards in Oxford. I enlisted in 1994. Later when I began getting roles after Uni... I was kind of astonished that people would actually employ me and pay me to do something I enjoyed. Mind you,” Hugh said and pointed at Tom, “I did wait tables in London in the beginning. But it didn’t take long before I was introduced to this guy and, before I knew it, I had landed some good parts in BBC productions.”

“I’m sure it’s not a problem looking the way you do!” Tom muttered.

“Don't sell yourself too short, Tom,” Hugh said. “You look good. Boyish. Nice. They’ll notice you. Don't worry.”

Tom snorted embarrassed. “Yeah, all right. If you say so, then it would be silly to contradict you.” Tom studied Hugh for a moment. “That sun tan does really suit you. I’m usually not for suntanned people per sé, but...” Tom plunged forward well knowing he really shouldn’t. “It’s immensely attractive on you.”

Hugh nodded and reached out to Tom again, touching his arm. “Did I mention that Burberry has picked me to be their Face of Men’s Fashion for 2004?”

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Tom sighed. “Feels like there is nothing left for me when I get my degree.”

Hugh laughed. “I’m ridiculously flattered they’ve considered me, but hey...” He lifted his arms. “I’m getting paid for it, so...”

“So you’re a model, too?”

“Well, it often goes hand in hand with being an actor.”

“And it helps to look good,” Tom pushed on.

“It sure does, Tom.”

Tom stomach decided to growl at him, and he pointed at Hugh. “Are you hungry? I’m obviously feeling peckish.”

“What time is it?” Hugh asked.

“Oh... I’m sorry, Hugh. Am I actually detaining you from something?”

“Tom,” Hugh said pointedly. “No. You’re not. I had absolutely no other plans today but saying good bye to dad.”

“Okay. It’s 3:26.”

“Well, then I guess it’s no surprise we’re hungry. What would we like?”

“I’m all for fish and chips...” Tom suggested. He didn’t really have much money to spend on grand dinners. Getting up, Tom went to fetch his wallet.

“Tom...” Hugh called to him. “You’re not paying.”

“For fish and chips?” Tom asked puzzled.

Hugh picked up his phone and went through some phone numbers before he dialled. “Hello? I’d like two fish and chips... and two large burger menus.” He looked at Tom. “You’re not a vegetarian or something?”

Tom shook his head. Definitely not.

“...put everything on the burgers... and two 500 millilitre cokes?” Hugh’s eyes slid toward, Tom who stuck his thumb up in agreement.

“Four cokes.”

Tom laughed. Hugh was planning on staying for a while. That was just... very grand.

“Addy, Tom?” Hugh asked and Tom came over and quickly gave the guy on the phone his address before Hugh hung up. 

"I'm even hungrier now than before we called!" Hugh got up and put his cup on the kitchen counter. Then he went and had another look at Tom’s books.

"Which is your favourite, Hugh?" Tom asked as he joined him.

"There are so many. I’m a bookaholic. I don’t just buy one book when I browse a book store. You should see my place. Book shelves all over the walls. But if I had to pick one right now...” Hugh stood in his own little bibliophile world thinking. “I'm rather fond of James Joyce. He was something else."

"Did you see 'Nora' a few years ago?" Tom asked.

Hugh nodded. "Definitely. Ewan McGregor played Joyce. We were in ‘Black Hawk Down’ together."

Tom smiled. "Yes, I noticed him in the film, mind you."

Hugh lifted an eyebrow. "You've got a thing for Ewan?"

"Even straight men's got a thing for Ewan," Tom said.

Hugh grunted noncommittally, and then he concentrated on Tom's books for a while. A few comments were exchanged when a certain volume turned out to be a common favourite.

"I really dig how similar we are education wise," Tom said.

"Me, too."

"I'm thrilled you studied English literature."

"I'm fond of our language," Hugh said.

"I studied Greek."

"I speak fluent French."

Tom shook his head. "This is getting spooky."

"I think it's wonderful," Hugh said.

Tom just beamed at him. Then the door bell rang, and Tom turned automatically.

“I'm getting this, Tom," Hugh insisted. "You can pay next time." There it was again, Hugh promising there would be a next time.

Tom didn’t have the space for a dining table. He'd prioritised a desk for his computer instead, so they cleared the coffee table and put the food there.

Tom took a thick throw pillow and sat on it. With his height, it was a better solution.

Hugh followed his example.

"Telly?" Tom asked, and Hugh agreed.

"Sure."

"Ever seen 'Hustle'?"

"It's that new show?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

Hugh reached out and ran a hand over Tom's back. Surprised, Tom turned his head, but Hugh just smiled that ‘I'm having a great time' smile at him. Tom grinned back and dug into his meal. 

"What are your siblings like?" he asked during a commercial break.

"Jack's into directing. Wants to start up his own company. Bit of a computer nerd as well to put it gently."

"Okay."

"He's easy going; smart... got too many friends sometimes so with me filming abroad more now, I rarely get to see him."

"Sarah's moving to India with her husband. She wants to be a journalist. Doing something good. I want that some day, when I have the excess energy for it," Tom said.

"I'm not sure what Kate wants. Advertising I think,” Hugh said. “Also something charitable like Sarah, I think."

"Emma wants to be an actress, too,” Tom said.

"Is she studying drama?"

"No. Just hoping for a break, I think. We're friends with this director, Joanna, and she has something up her sleeve. She might want Emma and I to be part of her project. It's rather exciting."

Hugh nodded. "Of course. But... you enjoy theatre though?"

"Yes. Absolutely. I love the theatre. It's here and now."

"The audience responds immediately..." Hugh reached out and grabbed Tom's hand with a brilliant smile. "...pretty intense."

"Yes. It is. You've done much?"

"Some. Not so much after I graduated, but I look forward to the next opening when I get the time."

"There's absolutely nothing like it," Tom said.

"Not even...?" Hugh insinuated and smiled.

Tom let his hand slip away and stuffed his mouth with chips. "I think you seriously need to get laid," he said and sighed. He needed to get laid himself.

"I like to talk about sex. Get used to it."

Tom shook his head with another smile.

"You smile a lot, Thomas."

"I blush a lot," Tom corrected him. "It's very unmanly."

Hugh reached out and put his hand around Tom's shoulders. "I like you. It's great to have a brother who thinks like me."

"Are you content?"

"I think I like a bit of anxiety... other times, I prefer to sit like this. Good company. Good wine..."

"You prefer wine?"

"Want to build my own wine cellar someday."

Tom laughed. "Wow... I'll help you drink it!"

Hugh smiled. "I expect you to. Look, I'm sitting on the couch now. My arse fell asleep."

Tom nodded and remembered that he had a bottle of wine in the fridge. "One sec." Jumping up, he quickly fetched the bottle along with two glasses.

"What? No cork?"

"No, I'm a poor student. Be lucky it wasn’t from a carton, Hugh,” Tom said and offered him a glass.

“I’ll drink anything with a pulse...” Hugh said and laughed. “I mean... with alcohol in it.” He held his glass still while Tom poured wine into it. Then Tom poured a glass for himself and put the bottle on the table. The two brothers toasted.

“How is your school paid?” Hush asked after a small sound of contentment flowed from his lips when he took another sip of his glass.

“Next two semesters are paid. Dad made sure of it... The likeliness of him passing away way too plausible. I’m making money from the plays though. I trust I can pay the rest of school with that.”

“When are you graduating?”

“2005.”

“Dad paid for lots of stuff. We never needed anything. He was always reliable that way,” Hugh said and ran his fingers through Tom’s soft curls.

Closing his eyes, Tom let himself enjoy the feeling, the goose bumps he had all over his body, and the general tingling.

“Come here,” Hugh said quietly, and Tom found himself climb back onto the couch and sit close to Hugh. Hugh embraced him and pulled him close.

“You shouldn’t keep it all inside, Thomas.”

Tom took a deep shuddering breath. It was coming and he didn’t know if he would be able to stop once he let go.

“I’ve cried enough. How did you know?”

“Because I’m just as miserable. We’ve been through a lot today,” Hugh said, his voice suddenly gruff with held back emotions.

Tom sniffled and put his arms around Hugh. Little hiccups rattled his chest occasionally as he sat there with Hugh. They didn’t speak as their eyes were directed at the telly – unseeing, but grateful for the noise to fill the space of sadness.

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Fact table:**
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Tom:  
> 1991 (age 10) Dragon Boarding School preparatory in Oxford  
> 1994 (age 13) The Eton College, Windsor  
> 2000 (age 19) Pembroke College, University of Cambridge, studying Classics Literature and Rugby  
> 2002 (age 21) Royal Academy of Dramatic Art RADA. Graduate of 2005
> 
> Sarah Alexandra Hiddleston (born 1979), journalist  
> Emma Elizabeth Hiddleston (born 1986), actress
> 
> Hugh:  
> 1980 (age 5) Edenhurst Preparatory School, Newcastle-under-Lyme  
> 1985 (age 10) Dragon Boarding School preparatory in Oxford  
> 1988 (age 13) The Winchester College, Theatre Royal  
> 1994 (age 19) St. Peter’s College, University of Oxford, English Literature and Language
> 
> John Christopher Dancy (born 1977), who is co-director of the travel company Trufflepig Travel.  
> Katharine Sarah Redman (born 1980) works at Education For All Global Monitoring Report, India and London.


	3. Irresistibility

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It was already dark outside and Tom was feeling drowsy.

“I’m not leaving you alone tonight, Tom,” Hugh said quietly. Tom looked at him. In the flimsy light from the telly, he saw trails of tears slipping down occasionally on Hugh’s cheeks. Tom’s face felt wet and bloated. Hugh just looked beautiful in his sorrow.

“Okay,” he said. “I’m ready to go to bed then.”

Hugh squeezed him and let go. “I’ll just... sleep on the couch,” he said.

Tom shook his head and got up. “Don't be ridiculous. We can share my bed.”

Without any objections, Hugh nodded and wiped his face in his sleeve. “I need the loo,” he said, and Tom pointed in the right direction, even though there weren’t any other options to where the bathroom could be situated.

Quickly, Tom picked up the leftovers and put them in the fridge. His mind was suddenly on overload again. He couldn’t believe he’d actually asked Hugh to sleep in his bed. With Tom in it, too. And Hugh hadn’t said anything about the absurdity of his proposal. Hadn’t thrown any prudish card at him on how improper it actually was. They were... Tom didn’t like to say it aloud any more. Not even think the words because they didn't make it any easier. Hugh was not his brother... Well, yes he was. Flesh, blood, and DNA. But he was... a beautiful human that Tom had never seen before and his whole being just... 

Tom took a deep breath and rested against the counter. Grabbing the edge hard with his fingers, Tom closed his eyes tightly and tried to control his breath, his arousal. He could barely stand the thought of not being allowed to touch Hugh, cross that boundary, and truly run his hands all over the man’s golden _naked_ body.

“All right?” Hugh asked, as he came out of the bathroom and saw Tom standing there lost in thought. “You need a piss?”

Tom schooled his features and just nodded before he disappeared into the bathroom. Taking several deep breaths, he eyed the toilet and couldn't help thinking that Hugh had just touched himself in here in order to take a leak.

Arousal surged through him again. Being sad and horny at the same time was surprisingly motivating. Tom hadn’t been this turned on by a guy as far as he remembered. This couldn't have been more different from any other guy he’d ever been attracted to for whatever reason. Hugh simply blew his mind in every category. However, now it didn't seem like such a great idea to spend the night in the same bed. 

Sure, Hugh had touched him a lot today, but that could just be him being kind and brotherly. He’d fired off a lot of innuendoes. But siblings did that to each other all the time. The teasing. All essential parts of growing up. 

Tom was suddenly a little miserable, but a new kind of miserable. Already lamenting the loss of a boyfriend he never even had. Tom managed to calm down from that disappointment and did his business. 

When he came out, he saw that Hugh was already in bed. His clothes were neatly folded on the couch and the telly had been turned off.

"This is a great bed," Hugh said and stretched luxuriously. 

Tom stared at his naked upper body. "Yeah. Dad bought it to make sure I would be comfortable, my height taken into consideration."

"Always dad."

"Yeah," Tom said and began to undress feeling a little awkward because Hugh was blatantly watching.

"I put my coat in your closet," Hugh said and unconsciously rubbed his palm slowly over a nipple. Tom looked away. There was nothing sexual in it. He did it himself, but watching Hugh do it reminded him of why a bloke did it. Obviously, because it felt good to rub that nipple.

"We look nothing alike," Hugh then said.

Surprised by the remark, Tom said, "I guess not. I'm skinny. You’re probably not."

"A bit - wouldn’t hurt to put on a bit of weight."

Tom was done and just dressed in his boxer briefs; he came over to the bed and slipped under the double duvet.

"Come here," Hugh whispered and Tom responded on instinct and the outrageous hunger for intimacy this man bought up in him. The hug was amazing and Tom whimpered when he finally came into contact with Hugh’s warm suntanned skin. He could practically smell the sun through the faint scent of pheromones also emanating from his body.

"Look at me, Tom," Hugh said and Tom did. "I'm here and you’ll be all right, all right?"

"Yes," Tom said automatically because he had no doubt that he would be all right.

Hugh rubbed his hair affectionately, and then he turned his head to press a kiss to Tom's lips. Tom froze for a moment before he realised that Hugh hadn't moved away. In fact, he pressed his lips harder against Tom's, and tilted his head to fit better against Tom's. Smoothly, Hugh rolled them around so he was on top of Tom who moaned with such relief. He didn’t have to worry about his feelings not being reciprocated or having to hide his attraction to this man any longer. Their lips parted readily and Hugh sucked Tom's tongue into his mouth back and forth so hard that Tom's brain was easily taking it for a blow job. Tom got a hard on instantly. A persistent hard on that was now squeezed between their stomachs. 

Hugh's hand sought down between their bodies and began to wriggle out of his underwear. Tom did the same, freeing his erection and they moaned into each other's mouths. And they kissed again with passion and carelessness. Tom's cock throbbed and leaked happily when Hugh sucked his tongue, his chin, his ears. The wetness sounded so obscene.

"It’s not enough, Hugh,” Tom said desperately in between kisses. “Please fuck me, fuck me. Won’t you?" Tom begged, as he swallowed saliva that made him drool.

"Are you kidding me?" Hugh asked incredulous that Tom would even doubt that he wouldn’t.

"No - I mean it," Tom said and laughed, too. 

“Of course I will!” Hugh said vigorously. Then Tom moaned as Hugh kissed down his long boyish torso. His tongue worked his nipples with hard little flicks.

“Pebbled,” Hugh said and sucked the tight bud. Tom felt the sensation all the way down to his cock and balls. Breathily, he exhaled and inhaled noisily when Hugh treated the other nipple the same way. “You like it?” Hugh asked.

“God, yes,” Tom moaned and tried to look at Hugh’s tongue while he did it. “Will you... will you suck me off?”

“Do you want me to?” Hugh asked, “Or do you want me to shag you into coming?”

“Uhm...” Tom tried to concentrate. “I didn't... I wasn’t sure where your preferences lay.”

“Honestly?” Hugh asked with a wide smile and then he grabbed Tom’s long heavy cock.

“Uhhh...” Tom’s brain couldn’t process all the good things happening to him at the same time. Another small moan escaped him when Hugh stuck out his warm tongue and licked some of the constantly oozing precome off.

“Mmm...” Hugh murmured with closed eyes, as he licked another drop off, and Tom could tell that he really did like the taste.

“You’ve done this before,” he stated. Hugh’s white teeth glinted in the pale moonlight.

“I can’t really see what we’re doing. Let’s turn on a lamp or something?” he said and expectantly looked up from between Tom’s long legs.

Sighing, Tom grinned. “Okay, man. Never expected this to happen when I woke up this morning.”

“Neither did I,” Hugh agreed, as he watched Tom twist to reach the small lamp on the floor next to the bed. “Lube? You got any lube, Tom?”

Tom fell back on the bed and cocked his head. “I’m out of lube, haven’t really been with anybody in a while.”

“Dad?” Hugh asked. He sat on his knees, legs spread beautifully.

Tom reached out and touched his cock. “Gorgeous cock. You are gorgeous all over, Hugh, but I think you have a fucking spectacularly hot dick.”

Hugh let his fingers run over the back of Tom’s hand as he caressed his cock and balls. “What do you use for tossing off then?”

Tom rubbed his thumb over the slit that was just as moist as his own. “Moisturiser,” he finally said. “I like to keep my dick smooth and baby soft,” he joked.

Smiling, Hugh ran his nails through the fine hairs on Tom’s thighs and pubic bush further up. “Where is it? Bathroom?” 

“Yeah. If it’s not on the shelf then in the cupboard under the sink. And bring some towels when you’re there anyway.”

“You don’t have a wank every night?” Hugh teased and got up to fetch the supplies.

“No. Too tired.”

“Dad?”

“Yup. Always good old dad.”

When he came back, Hugh crawled into Tom’s lap. Tom put his hands on Hugh’s buttocks and let them roam around a bit. “Backside of you is just as gorgeous. Gorgeous arse. Round and perky and fucking perfect.”

“So is yours,” Hugh said, “Not even your kilt could hide that from me. Toned, tight, gluteus maximuses,” he said admiringly. “Don’t ever be shy to have this beautiful arse filmed, Tom.”

Tom snorted. “Trust me. I won’t.”

Hugh smiled. “That makes two of us then.”

Their erections touched and Hugh squeezed out a dollop of moisturiser. “You’re ready for it?” Hugh asked and grinned when he noticed that Tom’s tongue stuck out between his teeth with anticipation.

“Yes,” Tom said and looked intensely at Hugh’s hands as he hand over hand slathered the slick on both of them, before he started a slow tug. Tom realised he’d kept his breath for a while and breathed out. It was so good.

“When I leave tomorrow,” Hugh said, “I want to be sure that you can still feel me."

Tom’s eyes were glazed. “I want that.”

“Good. Lift your legs. Let me have a look at you.” Moving backwards, Hugh watched with rapt interest as Tom pulled up his knees.

“Beautiful arsehole,” Hugh said and put a moist finger against Tom’s opening. “How many blokes have you let shag this?” he asked.

Tom put an arm across his face, and then he raised his hand and spread his fingers.

“Five?”

“Uhu... but some of them I had sex with more than once.”

“Perhaps you shagged some of those at the same time?” Hugh asked and added pressure to Tom’s bud.

“...um...” Tom said indecisively. He was unprepared for Hugh to being so perceptive.

Hugh grinned delightedly. “You did, you naughty boy... wow...”

Tom dropped his arm away, blushing but with a broad smile. “It was... good. _Fucking_ great.”

Hugh shook his head. "What did you do?"

"I... was on my knees on top of a bloke... and another bloke shagged me from behind."

"And bloke number two blew you?"

Tom nodded. "Yes. Then after... I sucked him off..."

"And bloke number two was still shagging you from behind?" Hugh said, visibly turned on and he pushed his finger inside Tom.

Tom coughed and squirmed. "There is something primal and debauched about being used by two blokes at the same time."

"Did you know them, or were they just someone you copped off with for the evening?"

"Why do you want to know?" Tom asked. Those particular blokes were the Whishaw twins Ben and James. Ben was a fellow student at RADA – James was just in on it for the experience.

"You're right. It doesn't matter. I've never tried more than one partner at a time."

"Are you gay, Hugh?" Tom asked.

"No. I'm bi sexual if you must have a label. I've slept with very few guys and I'm usually dedicated to the person I'm with."

"So... you've only slept with people you dated?"

"Yes."

Tom's lips parted. "So... you're with someone?" he asked, and he didn’t care that his disappointment showed in his face.

"Since dad... no."

"Oh," Tom breathed, feeling tremendous relief.

"Like you, I haven’t been with anyone for a while."

"So you're horny?" Tom asked and put his hand on Hugh's wrist.

"Obviously - but I feel a lot of conflicting things for you, Tom. Very good but also very confusing feelings."

"Me, too," Tom said, and moaned when Hugh moved his finger to rub gently at Tom's prostate.

"All right?" Hugh asked.

"Yeah. All right. More than all right," Tom sighed and closed his eyes. Hugh leaned forward into the apex of Tom's thighs and kissed him.

Putting his arms around Hugh's neck, Tom pleaded, "More..."

"Not too fast, am I?" Hugh asked.

Tom opened his eyes again and smiled lazily. "It's fucking all right. Besides, I don’t mind a little pain.”

Hugh laughed into the next kiss and they chuckled together. Then Hugh added another finger and Tom swallowed more accumulated saliva.

"Gods... I want this so much. I had no idea."

Hugh couldn't agree more. "I want you, too. It's pretty serious for me."

"Yes, it is," Tom said.

"Do you... do you have any condoms?" Hugh suddenly asked.

Tom frowned. Of course they should be cautious. They didn't know each other and Tom realised how promiscuous he'd presented himself - even if the group sex was only that one time. All other times he was with one guy and he always used condoms. That Hugh only slept with one person at the time didn’t mean he was more careful than Tom. Fine. "I have some in my wallet."

"I'll get it."

"On the counter..."

"Right." Hugh was back again and put a couple of foils on the mattress close to Tom's head. "Comfortable?" he asked.

Tom put his hand on Hugh's thigh. "Yeah. Let's get on with it."

Hugh bent down and kissed him. Tom's hands slid back on Hugh's arse and let a finger slip down his crack. Slipping even lower, he touched Hugh's anus and made him gasp softly. Bringing his finger back, Tom let it linger under his nose and smelled it.

Hugh laughed when he saw it. "Really?"

Tom nodded. "You smell great. It's taken me some courage to admit that everything involved with sex is potent and smells overwhelmingly good."

"Well, you smell good, too. And you taste even better," Hugh said.

Tom winked and stuck his finger in his mouth. Hugh’s flavour was faint, but Tom imagined that when he'd worked up a good sweat he'd taste even better. "I want to rim you, Hugh," Tom said. He wanted to get it out in the open. "I don't rim random blokes, just those I'm comfortable about. But you..." Tom looked at him, "You really make me want to try all the things I still hadn't felt like exploring with a bloke."

Hugh smiled. "Trust me. I want to do everything in the book with you, too. It's cool you have so many ideas."

"You seem so confident. You've swept me off my feet," Tom joked.

"Perhaps I'm overcompensating. I find that you're the confident one," Hugh said and inserted a third finger.

Tom inhaled sharply. There was slight sting in his rear and it felt amazing when Hugh stretched him further. There wasn’t much room for him to stimulate Tom, but that would change once Hugh slipped inside him. Feeling pliable and relaxed enough when he compared how Hugh's fingers felt and the size of his erection, Tom didn’t want to prolong the preparation any longer.

"I want you now," Tom said.

Hugh closed his eyes. "Gods, I’m so hard," he said and bit his lip, as pleasure coursed through him by Tom's words. "I hope I'll last long enough to just get inside you," he said, and grunted as he concentrated on not coming. His cock leaked strings of precome and his nipples were achingly hard pink pebbles.

Tom saw everything and wanted to touch Hugh's erogenous zones that were so sensitive to touch right now. Then he saw Hugh's eyes were dilated with arousal, and he moaned. "You’d better last that long. Just strangle the bastard! Squeeze your cock so you won’t come."

Hugh had goose bumps all over his body and he chuckled, "I _am_ dad's bastard, Tom."

Tom laughed, too, "Don't... it's too much. It just makes you even sexier. Gods... to be shagged by a bastard. Made out of wedlock."

"Don't, Tom," Hugh cried. "It just gives me images of them in bed together."

Tom shuddered, "Oh god no. It's the worst. Isn’t it?"

Hugh smiled with gritted teeth. "Yes. It's actually helping... imagining them in bed. It's a sure turn off."

Tom grinned and pulled up his knees. "Okay. Enough of fantasising about other people shagging when I’m right here. C’mon. Shag me, you dirty bastard," he said in a low raspy voice that had Hugh shudder visibly with expectations. Hugh crawled closer and kissed him, but Tom grabbed his hair and pulled him off roughly. “Now!” Tom ordered and braced himself mentally for the shag of his life.

Hugh gritted his teeth and did it. Grabbed Tom’s knees to cant his hips further and just pushed right into him.

Tom practically screamed and his hands flew to Hugh’s shoulders for purchase. “Shit... don't move.”

Hugh bit his lips again. His body was surrounded by a tight vice and he laughed, but it sent waves of pleasure through his body. Not good. Too good. He snarled at himself to prevent from falling over the edge. Grasping for the root of his cock, he squeezed down hard.

“I’ve forgotten how warm people are inside.”

Tom did try and smile but was in fact busy taking deep breaths.

“Are you hurt?” Hugh asked, suddenly aware that Tom might have insisted on being penetrated too soon.

“It’s good... Just...” Tom smiled and chuckled. “It’s very good. Just need a second. Shit. You’re bigger than I thought.”

Hugh couldn’t help smiling, but he concentrated on not moving. Ripping Tom would be very uncool. But eventually, he couldn’t hold back any longer and with a moan, he pulled half way out. Tom’s eyes rolled to the back and moaned, too. Hugh moved a little to make Tom fit completely under him. Then slowly, he worked his hips, fucking Tom fully with each thrust. Tom’s prostate was grazed every time, and he couldn’t stop expressing his pleasure.

“You’re hyperventilating,” Hugh groaned in pleasure. 

“Yes, yes,” Tom gasped.

“You’ll pass out,” Hugh said, his own mouth agape. “Uh... Christ, you’re tight, Tom. I can’t hold back any longer.”

“You were holding back?” Tom asked as he grabbed the headboard and strained his body to connect with Hugh’s pelvis. Hugh’s moans were laboured and his movements became stuttering. 

“So good. Oh, Tom.”

Tom was close, too, and laboured to fuck himself on Hugh’s cock. “Ohhh...” he cried out. His body locked and let go of the headboard to grab Hugh’s shoulders in a vice tight grip as they came together.

Clearing his voice after a few moments passed, Hugh said, “I think I forgot the condom, Tom...”

Tom focused his euphoric blown mind on what Hugh had just said. Slowly, dread crept up his spine. “What?” he asked as he tried to catch his breath and clear the fog in his buzzing brain.

“I’m clean! Jesus!” Hugh cried out when he realised what the expression on Tom’s face meant. “I just wanted to lessen the mess... afterwards.”

“Why didn’t you tell me that was why you asked for condoms?”

“I’m sorry. You should have insisted to know why, too.”

Tom breathed out and nodded. “Sure... only. I wanted your mess. I wanted your come to mess down my leg.”

Hugh bit his lip sheepishly. “I’m sorry,” he repeated. “I’ve never forgotten before. Like ever.”

“Me either. I just thought we didn’t need it... until you asked for them.”

“I cannot stand when other people are assuming and here I did it to you, Tom,” Hugh apologised.

Tom’s heartbeat was still yapping away and his chest rose and fell unevenly.

Hugh’s chest was gleaming with sweat and it was caught in the light from the small lamp.

With half lidded eyes, Tom nodded and finally let go of Hugh’s shoulders. “Just tell me, all right? And just for the record, I’m clean, too.”

Sighing, Hugh began to slip out, but Tom pushed him back in using his heels. “And don’t worry about it. I still want you.”

Hugh smiled. Well he had worried for a second that that was all it took for Tom to dump him... half brother or not.

“So...” Hugh straightened and his cock did slip out this time. Leaning forward, he kissed Tom who grabbed his hair again to make the kiss last.

“So...” Tom said as well, when they let go with a delicious slick sound. Hugh’s tongue slipped into Tom’s mouth and lazily they licked the skin around their mouths and inside them.

“Do you ever take it?” Tom asked.

Hugh sucked at Tom’s throat. “I’m versatile. Tending towards bottoming when I’m with guys.”

Tom grinned. “I look forward to that. You’ll let me shag you?”

“Yes. As much as you want. I like a good hard cock, too.”

“Hopefully, we won’t argue about who’s topping who!” Tom said.

“I’m sure it’ll depend on the mood,” Hugh replied and looked lovingly at Tom. 

Pushing Hugh off gently, Tom smiled. “Give me one of those towels, would you?”

Hugh found them and they cleaned off for a few moments.

“Good night, Hugh,” Tom said.

Hugh curled a little into himself and closed his eyes. “Good night, baby.”

Tom reached down and turned off the lamp, and then he pulled the duvet over them and moved closer to fit a leg between Hugh’s. Grabbing Tom’s waist, Hugh let his hand rest in the modest swell his hip provided.

They were asleep before they realised the other one was.

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	4. Four Months Later

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"You've met someone!" Jack said to his brother. He was visiting Hugh on the set of 'Arthur' to sniff the atmosphere. Hugh looked at him with almost shocked surprise. 

"What if I have?" he gambled.

"Someone from this set?" Jack needled him.

"No."

"Plenty of hot boys to sink your teeth into, Hughie."

"Jack... no. It's complicated."

"The best kind."

Hugh smiled and ran a palm over his full beard, but then he remembered how Tom had come all over his face and how he meticulously had licked off his cum from Hugh’s face afterwards... that was a week ago. "It's still... fragile and..."

"Complicated?" Jack laughed. "You’re full of shite, Hughie."

Hugh smiled and shrugged. "What can I say?"

"It's one of the blokes here, right?" Jack said even though Hugh tried to deny it. "Probably that Welsh bloke you couldn’t stop talking about the last time... who is in this film, too!"

"Who?" Hugh asked with a frown. "What? Ioan? Oh, c'mon. No, it's..." Hugh sighed. Jack was too clever with the way he asked, always making Hugh tell him what he wanted to know without even trying too hard.

"Tell me!" Jack asked with a big smile.

"I can’t - it's too soon."

"You can tell me everything." Jack said and waggled his eyebrows.

"No... not this time, Jack." Hugh looked at him almost regrettably. Because he really did want to be able to share the wonderful thing that had happened in his life with Jack, but he couldn’t handle the consequences of his rejection right now.

"Nice costume by the way!" Jack said and pointed at Hugh’s naked legs.

"It's a realistic costume."

"Yeah, and I bet all the other lads are wearing leather pants!"

Hugh rolled his eyes but it wasn't far from the truth.

"They just want to get into your knickers..."

"That's quite all right!" Hugh interrupted him. “I’m off to the catering tent and I don’t really have more time to entertain you.”

Jack left with the threat to appear out of nowhere in Hugh’s home, and surprise him while he was balls deep into Ioan Gruffudd.

Hugh gave him the finger as he walked in the opposite direction of whatever way Jack was heading. The smile he'd plastered on his face was becoming strenuous, as he imagined that scenario taking place only casting Tom instead of Ioan.

Shuddering, he rubbed his knees. It was a bit chilly and the woollen kilt only offered as much warmth as its length. Hugh was still a bit tanned from the Maldives but make up was doing a great job toning it down. His hair was a bit longer now. Four months of growth had done wonders to his hair length but a wig had been needed in the beginning of the shoot nevertheless. 

All the facial hair had made Tom turned on more than Hugh could imagine, so perhaps he should keep his hair longer for a while?

Hugh sighed when he saw the horse he was riding. Riding with his legs bare was rough on the skin, and he really liked riding horses. He also liked riding Tom's dick. That boy was gifted with a god given stamina and incredible cock, and Hugh often came just from riding him. Smiling, he could hardly wait for the weekend. A couple of days in London with no fake snow and smelling of animals. And the loo would only be a few metres away. Vacant.

“You look awfully happy!” Ioan said. Hugh nodded and knew his face was split in a grin that demanded an explanation.

“I’m just... looking forward to the weekend I suppose.”

“I was meant to stay at the hotel, but I have an appointment in London... So I was wondering if you could spare the sofa?” Ioan asked charmingly.

Hugh took a very slow, deep breath. “Look... I’m sorry, but I’m not staying at my own place this weekend.”

Ioan smiled regrettably and reached out and ruffled Hugh’s curls. Hugh allowed it for a moment and then he backed out the caress as politely as possible.

“Hugh...” Ioan said.

Hugh turned and looked at him. It was striking how similar they looked in this movie with a full beard and luscious dark curls.

“I thought we had a thing...” Ioan clarified and pointed between the two of them.

Hugh’s eyes widened comically. “We don’t...”

“We had a thing in ‘Black Hawk Down’.”

“No, we didn’t. _You_ thought we had and, as I recall very vividly, I just didn't reciprocate.”

Ioan stepped closer into Hugh’s personal space. He was about Tom’s height, but the Welsh just made Hugh feel a little intruded upon. 

“We don’t have a thing, Ioan,” he said. This to-ing and fro-ing had been going on for a few weeks, and it was becoming annoying. Sure there was some chemistry back in 2001, but it had been one-sided from loan’s part, because the chemistry Hugh experienced was a short-lived but intensely reciprocated ‘thing’ with Josh Hartnett. Not Ioan.

But obviously, Ioan had seen it through a different pair of binoculars. He pointed at Hugh again. “You’re seeing someone?” he asked.

“Jesus Christ! You sound like my brother!”

“But you are seeing someone?”

“Ioan... I know we’re done filming shortly, but do me a favour and stop making the rest of it more awkward than you’re usually capable of?”

Ioan sighed. “Well excuse a bloke for liking you!”

“This is not cool. I’m telling you I’m not interested. Stop acting like you can’t hear me. We don’t have a thing! - you and I...” he pointed at him. “...we don’t have a thing,” Hugh said and walked away; feeling Ioan’s eyes on his body. Now it was just sad. 

However, the funny thing was that hadn’t he met Tom, he would probably be tempted to roll in the sack with Ioan and they might even have ended up being a couple, because Hugh had a soft spot for his good looking co-stars in his various movies. Only now – he was in a relationship with someone he was deeply in love with. It was new, fresh, exciting, and he was not ruining it for a pointless fling with somebody who didn’t even turn him on.

“I want you to back off. This is bordering on stalking.”

“I’m not stalking you. What an offensive thing to say!” Ioan said.

“You’re offended by this? Imagine the stuff I hold back, then,” Hugh said and started to walk away.

“If you change your mind...” he heard Ioan say.

“I know who to call,” Hugh ended the clichéd sentence.

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“Is he still trying to lure you into letting him shag you?” Joel Edgerton asked. 

Hugh sighed at everything nowadays, but this in particular. They stood in the catering tent picking out food from the buffet. “It’s complicated,” Hugh said and balanced some bread, cheese, and two medium sized omelettes.

“You’ve said that for two weeks now.”

“Yeah. Everybody is coming on to me.”

“I’m not.”

“Well, I’m just waiting for you to surprise me,” Hugh joked.

Joel laughed and put his cold hand up under Hugh’s kilt. “Surprise!”

Hugh bent and twisted away. “Jesus!” he whispered and quickly had a look to see if someone else was watching them. Joel just winked and went to find them a seat at a table.

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Hugh stood before the bathroom mirror with Tom smothered against his back. Tom pressed his hands against Hugh’s pecs and, when he spread his fingers, they enjoyed watching as Hugh’s nipples peeked between the spaces. 

“Pinch your nipples, darling,” Tom said in a voice laced with arousal, and Hugh did. They were already hard from the slight coolness of the room. He liked Tom’s sexual fantasies that always made the both of them feel good as well as entertained. Hugh had never thought of himself as limited in his sexual appetites, but Tom brought a lot of fun with him into their bed.

“You’re so hot,” Tom murmured deepening his voice to a filthy baritone. “Spread your legs,” he said, and Hugh complied immediately.

Tom pushed his long hard cock between Hugh’s thighs, and Hugh reached in and squeezed him teasingly.

“Bend over and take it,” Tom commanded and Hugh moaned as he watched in the mirror the debauched way he did take it. 

“You’re beautiful,” Tom said with longing and then he smiled cheekily at their reflection. It took off the brunt of what they were saying to each other and kept it real and desirable. “I want to do this to you in public,” he said, testing waters.

“Jesus!” Hugh exclaimed in surprise and the sheer thought brought his arousal up to a higher level as it surged through him and made him so very very hard. Hugh let go of the counter and began to jerk off.

“Don’t close your eyes,” Tom admonished him. “Stop squeezing me,” Tom instructed. Hugh slowed down the rhythm and found Tom’s eyes in the mirror. Hugh sent him a passionate gaze that was difficult to hold. He moaned out loud when he heard the sound of the lube bottle open. Then his lover slipped a long, slick finger into his hole.

“Mmmm...” he grunted when Tom found his prostate. “Easy... I’m ready to go anytime...”

“How many do you need?” Tom asked and removed his finger.

“Two... two is enough.”

“Three then,” Tom chuckled. Hugh pushed his arse back to re-establish contact with Tom’s pelvis and heavy cock.

“Just... hurry...”

“You can’t hurry these things,” Tom tutted and slapped Hugh’s arse cheek.

Having to close his eyes, Hugh breathed carefully when Tom drizzled more lube on his fingers as well as down Hugh’s crack.

“I don't do this often enough,” Tom said.

Hugh smiled. “Yeah – you’re my cock slut. Too eager to bottom. Huuuuh...” Hugh inhaled sharply. 

“Sorry...” Tom said with a broad smile.

“G-god!” 

Tom rubbed his prostate lightly, but it felt amplified more than Hugh could take. “Tom... stop... it’s too much.”

“So... I guess you’re as ready as you can be... juuuust one more finger...”

“Tom... it’ll be in vain if you do.”

“All right,” Tom agreed. With one hand on Hugh’s hip and the other holding his cock firmly, he pushed into his lover.

Hugh bent his neck and rested against Tom’s shoulder. With both hands, he steadied himself against the counter and pushed back to greet Tom, working together deliciously. 

Immediately, Tom’s hands found Hugh’s chest and he held him still against his body.

Hugh was gasping softly. “Huhu... it’s no good...”

Reaching down, Tom grabbed Hugh’s cock, but his palm was slick and only managed to slide off. 

Hugh cried out, “I’m going to come, so don’t stop now!”

Tom grabbed him again and began to fuck him energetically. Hugh’s erection slipped effortlessly back and forth in the sheath he created with his long fingers. He tried to look in the mirror at the same time to enjoy how fucking great they looked together, but it was difficult. It felt too good to keep his eyes focused. Tom turned his neck and captured Hugh’s panting mouth in a sloppy kiss.

Hugh came moaning and Tom squeezed harder and pulled Hugh close, making his hips keep still as his orgasm shuddered through him. Hugh’s body clutched him. “Uh... so good,” Tom moaned back into Hugh’s mouth. He let go of Hugh’s cock and started to really drive into him, rutting selfishly and perhaps a bit too roughly as he took advantage of Hugh’s position.

“Fuck... my thighs...”

“You’ll be able to boast your battle wounds in the morning.”

“Yeah. But what do I tell make up?” Hugh smiled widely and pushed a hand against the mirror.

“That you were tied up and gang rape fisted all night with each of the weirdo fake hands you’re so fond of collecting,” Tom said.

Hugh laughed with a groan. “Yes... they may even... b-buy it,” he grunted.

“It’ll be our sex tape. Oh, imagine we actually filmed you being fisted with one of those hands!” Tom said excitedly with a smile. 

“Quite. And now I’ll have to throw them away,” Hugh replied and found Tom’s eyes via the mirror.

Tom thrust a few more times, inhaled sharply, and kept his breath as he came.

“Breathe, Tom,” Hugh said and smiled at him.

“Uh... that was amazing...” Tom breathed out slowly. Kissing Hugh’s ear, he slipped out of him.

Hugh turned and wrapped his arms around Tom’s neck. They stood still for a while looking at each other lovingly and a little timidly, too.

Next week they were going to do it. They’d decided that when Hugh wrapped filming “King Arthur”, they were going to tell their families what was going on between them. 

Saying that after all these months had passed since their dad’s funeral the two families had gotten closer, would be unfair. Tom had admitted to his mum that he was socialising with Hugh and his siblings. She didn’t take it with much enthusiasm. In fact, she didn’t really comment at all, and Tom let her process that in her own tempo. And on Hugh’s part, he’d also told his family that he was socialising with... well not all of the Hiddleston’s but his brother Tom.

Tom had met both Kate and Jack since the funeral. Kate had invited Hugh over and, on one occasion, he’d brought Tom with him. Kate had been surprised but it had turned out nicely. Tom had made a point of not sitting next to Hugh at any times. Stop touching him was difficult enough. Kate hadn’t caught on to anything though, and Hugh knew that she was usually very perceptive. To be honest, he’d barely spoken to Tom that afternoon. Kate had been too enamoured by Tom’s charming personality, and Hugh even suspected her to crushing on him that day.

Jack had bumped into them while they went grocery shopping one evening. He’d been more than surprised to see them together. Since neither of the two lovers were ready to come out to him in the middle of the produce aisle, they hurriedly explained they were having dinner to discuss more details in the added will from their dad, before Hugh went away to film “King Arthur.” Jack hadn’t bat an eyelash and his later visit on set confirmed that he was far from suspicious of Tom being Hugh’s current love interest.

“They’re going to slaughter us,” Tom envisioned when they cleaned up after their hot little mirror kink.

“No, they’re not, but they might have a few choice words pertaining how unethical we are.”

“I don't think we are unethical. We’d never met before and we were attracted before we knew about our blood relation,” Tom said.

“It’s really difficult for me to perceive you as a brother,” Hugh said.

“Don’t then. Please,” Tom said. “It’s not that I live in denial... well a little bit,” he grinned and Hugh smiled back. “It’s just that I also don’t see you as my brother. I’m nowhere close to that. And I don’t want that.”

“That’s what people will be trying to make you. Us.”

“It’s not illegal for brothers to have a relationship. We can’t hurt anybody else other than their feelings.”

“True. No abnormal offspring to be concerned about.”

“But there is the stigma... and as if it wasn’t bad enough that we’re...” Tom stopped but then he made an elaborating hand gesture, “Actually, my parents never asked me to question whether I thought I was _really_ gay or if it was just a phase I went through in my puberty. But for argument’s sake, _traditionally_ , it’s bad enough that we’re gay. Did we really have to jump each other as well?”

Hugh smiled and nodded. “Mum and dad... had to ask _me_ if I was gay.”

Tom laughed. “Wow! Really?”

“I was always great friends with the girls I came into contact with from the girl prep schools that I managed to invite home, but mum or dad never caught me trying to be more intimate... like kissing or holding hands. Mind you, I did, just not when they were looking! Especially with mum, because dad was rarely there and so on. But... the _one_ guy I did sneak a snog from... _that_ she noticed.”

Tom laughed. “How typical!”

“I had no idea what to tell her. I didn’t know I was bisexual. Wasn’t even aware of the concept when they asked. I was only like twelve – maybe thirteen tops...” Hugh shrugged. 

"How mortifying."

"Yeah... but after a while, it was actually rather cool. I didn’t have to hide from my family the fact that I was also interested in boys. At least I had a place where I didn’t have to hide it."

"Did you have to hide it?"

"In boarding school?" Hugh said. "C’mon. You were there yourself."

"Yes. But I wasn't hiding it," Tom said. "I had a few remarks, but wasn't exactly bullied."

"Lucky for you," Hugh mused. "Anyway... What do we tell them?"

"Well... why not show up holding hands? Let them ask the questions?"

Hugh pursed his lips and nodded. "It could work."

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	5. Revelation time

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One o'clock in the afternoon six days later, found the two lovers standing nervously in front of Hugh’s mum’s house. Both his siblings' cars were there, so they were the only ones missing.

Hugh grabbed the old-fashioned door bell pull and yanked it downwards. Their hearts were racing and even though they'd planned it, they forgot to reach for each others' hands when Sarah Dancy opened the door.

"Oh, hello, Tom," she greeted him.

"Hello, Sarah..." Tom turned and looked hesitatingly at Hugh. "You _did_ mention I was coming, didn’t you?"

Hugh frowned and wondered if amidst all their panic he in fact had remembered to mention to his mum that Tom would be joining them this afternoon.

"Apparently... it slipped my mind," he said sheepishly and smiled at his mother. "But you don’t mind, right, mum?"

"No, of course not. Welcome, Tom," she said and pulled the taller man in for a hug. 

Taken completely by surprise by her gesture, he awkwardly hugged her back. As he did with his sisters and own mum, he bent in the knees to accommodate her smaller height.

“It’s not your fault that Hugh’s a dreamer,” Sarah said.

Tom turned his head to look at Hugh who self-consciously rubbed the back of his neck and deliberately didn’t meet his eyes. “Is he now?”

“Good god,” Hugh groaned. “Next thing you know, she’ll produce the photo album where I'm a fat toothless baby writhing on a sheepskin.”

“Just say the word,” Sarah threatened good-naturedly. Tom smirked and let go of the hug with an inward sigh. It might be the only one he’d ever receive from her again.

“Shall we go inside?” Sarah asked. “Jack and Kate are already here.”

“I noticed. Let’s get it over with,” Hugh said and his smile became strained.

“I’m sure they won’t mind, Hugh,” Sarah said. 

“I’m sure they won’t either. They’ve met Tom since the funeral.”

“Oh?” Sarah said and looked keenly interested at them. “You’ve become great friends? I think it's great, really. It would be a shame if we couldn’t agree due to circumstances.”

“Yes... by all means. Circumstances,” Hugh repeated and shot Tom a naughty look.

Tom just smiled and checked his hair when he passed a mirror.

“You look dashing. We can serve you for tea,” Hugh said and winked.

Tom stopped. “We’re not staying that long are we?”

“I doubt we’ll be invited to stay for tea to be honest. Might even have to just keeping your jacket on.”

Tom sighed and smoothed his hand over his hair, and sighed again when the curls just bounced back. He followed Hugh and his mum around the house and into a surprisingly large kitchen. Hugh’s siblings were already seated and they, too, looked surprised when they saw Tom towering behind their older brother.

“Oh... hi, Tom!” Jack said and nodded at him.

“Hi, Jack. Kate,” Tom greeted his half siblings.

“Hugh decided to bring Tom along. Isn’t that nice?” Sarah said and then her eyes dropped when she noticed Tom's hand on Hugh’s shoulder and Hugh’s was around Tom’s waist.

“Um... right... Would you like to sit down?” she asked and Tom nodded with a nervous smile.

Letting go of each other with demonstratively slow motions, Tom found a spot in front of Jack and Hugh took the seat next to him. Kate had subtly moved to the spot at the end of the table close to the glass door toward the garden. Sarah took the other end of the table after fetching an extra set of plates, glasses, and utensils. 

“Thank you,” Tom said and waited with baited breath for something to happen. However, all that occurred was the Dancy’s helping themselves to the lined up dishes on the table they sat at.

“This looks absolutely delicious,” Tom said. “I hope I have room in my stomach to try everything once.”

Sarah smiled pleased. “Then you’ll have to come back another day to sample the things you hopefully don't miss out on today.”

“Thank you,” Tom said and caught Hugh’s eyes.

Hugh had only piled up a small amount of food. Tom usually had a great appetite and had no shame. His plate was completely covered in food. 

Conversation ran smoothly, and the couple wondered when a natural opening to deliver their message would arise.

“It’s really sweet of Hugh to bring you along,” Kate said and smiled at them.

“Oh... um... yes, well. I...”

“Pass the chicken salad?” Sarah asked him.

“Of course,” Tom obliged and handled it to her via Hugh.

“He... um. We’ve gotten more in common than we thought after dad’s funeral and settling the edited will.”

“How so?” Sarah asked and passed some pickles to Jack.

“We’re both actors,” Tom and Hugh said unanimously.

“Ah yes. That must be it.”

“Becoming best... friends?” Jack said and looked at Hugh while he said it.

A cold sensation ran down Hugh’s spine. There was something going on, but he dismissed it as nerves.

“We are... I mean, like. We’re certainly working... I mean... you know..”

“That’s good to hear, dear,” Sarah said. “I hope you weren’t such a handful to your mum as Hugh was to me.”

“Mum!” Hugh lay down his utensils with a loud clang. “Please!”

Kate chuckled. “Oh, don’t get worked up, Hugh. I’m sure Tom isn’t prudish in your household!” 

The silence was deathening. Three pairs of inquisitive eyes looked at Tom and Hugh who felt like insects under a microscope.

“Why would you say that?” Hugh finally asked, his pulse hammering in his throat.

“Oh, c’mon, Hughie!” Sarah said with a laugh. “Get it out already!”

“Get what out?” Hugh asked indignantly.

“Fine...” Tom said and put down his own utensils. “I’m... with Hugh. We’re in love and we’re in a relationship. There!”

“Well, finally,” Jack muttered. “Could barely stand the tension much longer.”

“You knew?” Hugh asked incredulous. “All this time?”

“Are you daft?” Jack asked. “At the set you glowed like a little sun and when I saw you with Tom earlier - I’m smart like that, mind you - I put two and two together, and got really disturbing images in my head of why you’d become so freakishly happy after meeting Tom.”

“Huhhh...” Hugh breathed out and grabbed his glass of water and almost got the contents in the wrong pipe. 

Tom sucked in his lips in a small smile. Then he looked at Hugh’s family in turn and said, “Thank you.”

Sarah got up and put an arm around both their necks. “It’s really all right. You’re a lovely young man, Tom.”

“Did _you_ know?” Hugh asked Kate. “When we met?”

“Hugh... you’re a great actor, and Tom as well, but I noticed how you practically weren’t looking at each other and when Jack told me what he’d discovered, I felt so sorry you thought you had to hide it.” She winked at Tom. “I’d gone for you myself... but since you’re my brother _and_ gay... I promise I’ll behave.”

“We were waiting for you to tell us. But it was torture to watch you try to pretend you were not a couple... so we decided to help you the next time one of us bumped into you,” Sarah said apologetically but smiling at the same time.

“Thank you!” Tom said and stood up. “I’m sorry. I’ve been so nervous. I need to... excuse me.”

Hugh turned in his seat and looked at his retreating back. “We’ve both been nervous.”

“How long have you...?” Sarah asked.

“Since the funeral... literally. It was... I’ve never experienced anything like it. I mean, the attraction we both felt... luckily _before_ we knew... but _after_ knowing, it just seemed so irrelevant that we share the same dad. We clicked as they say.”

“I think he’s very statuesque with his height and all... delectable,” Jack joked and grinned. “Might use him in my next project. Couldn’t really stand that Gruffudd bloke anyway.”

“Look, there’s nothing wrong with Ioan, Jack. I admit, he wasn’t very... accommodating when I explained why I wasn't interested," Hugh said and took a deep breath. With nerves twitching in his cheek, he tried to smile at his family. “Anyway... now we just need to tell _his_ family.”

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Two days later, the two lovers were standing outside Diana Hiddleston’s home in Suffolk.

“I can’t do this,” Tom whispered and grasped Hugh’s hand.

“Hopefully, they’ll accept this, too. I’m still shocked that _my_ family already knew we were together.”

Tom nodded and wiped his free hand over his face. “I know they’ll accept me. They’ve accepted every boyfriend I’ve ever dragged home. It’s just so fucking daunting to present my own brother.”

“Maybe we should just leave a note and run away screaming?” Hugh suggested.

Tom laughed. “Right. We still need a plan B though.” He looked at Hugh and narrowed his eyes. “My mum’s been a theatrical stage manager for as long as I can remember. Her tolerance has quite a long range.”

“I’m glad,” Hugh said. “So it would be fair to say that she’s used to all the secrecy and alternative lifestyles connected with theatre life?”

“Yes, it would be fair to say,” Tom said. 

“Let’s do it then,” Hugh said and pushed the doorbell.

Tom hugged him fiercely and closed his eyes. Hugh muffled a cry of surprise and it was in that fashion that Diana found her son when she opened the door.

“Tom...?” 

Tom stepped away from Hugh and buried his fists in his coat pockets. “Mum...”

“Mrs. Hiddleston...” Hugh said.

“Come inside,” Diana said. “Your sister is here.”

“Thanks,” both Tom and Hugh said.

Diana snorted and hid her mouth. “I’m sorry. The likeliness between the two of you is actually a very canny.”

Tom smiled. “No worries. It’s still very new.”

“Sarah couldn't make it. She’s back in India," Diana said as she hugged Tom briefly.

“Oh...” Tom said disappointed. He didn’t get to see her so often.

“How do you do?” Diana said and addressed Hugh offering her hand for a proper greeting.

“I’m well. Thanks. And yourself?”

“I’m fine thank you.”

“Mum...” Tom said, but Diana shook her head. 

“Whatever we have to discuss we should include your sister.”

“All right,” Tom said and gently pushed Hugh in the direction of the sitting room.

Predictably, the coffee table was set with tea cups and perfect little cakes. Everything looked nice, and so Tom was sorry they would very likely have to ruin the mood.

Emma came from behind them and greeted Hugh kindly.

“Hello, Hugh. It’s been a while.”

“Yes, it has. Nice to see you, too.”

“So you’re spending an awful lot of time together?” Emma said and flung herself in a comfortable chair. Reaching out, she poured some tea and grabbed a couple of cakes.

Diana sat down on the other chair and the big empty sofa looked a bit intimidating because that was the only spot where Tom and Hugh could sit.

“Have a seat!” Diana said encouraging. “You look like you’re waiting for a firing squad!”

Tom laughed nervously but sat down. Hugh sat down next to him... closer than friends would usually do.

“You look like you have ants in your pants, Tom,” Emma said.

Tom poured some tea. “What’s it to you?”

“I can see what’s going on, you know,” Diana said and leaned forward. “I’m not sure I can approve... but then I can’t exactly relate to why you’ve decided to do it anyway.”

“Do what, mum?” Tom asked calmly.

“I have to be honest. I was shocked when I realised James had children with his past relationship.”

“She’s called Sarah, mum,” Tom said.

“Fine. Sarah then.”

“Hugh has nothing to do with it. He doesn’t even deserve to hear this. You’ve said it quite a lot of times already. We know where you stand,” Emma said. “And it’s really getting old, mum.”

“Fine.”

“My mum doesn’t need me to defend her,” Hugh said, “but since she’s not here to defend herself... all I can say is that dad chose to deceive both of you, Mrs. Hiddleston. He had six kids whom he loved very much even if he couldn't always be there... and I love Tom.”

Diana looked like the fight she’d been prepared for zapped her a little of energy now that her guns had been taken from her. “You love Tom?” She looked at Tom, but her son looked at Emma.

“Tom?”

“You heard him. And I really don’t care if you don't approve.”

“I...” she looked a little confused. “Approve of what?”

“C’mon, mum!" Emma said. “They’re in love.”

Tom looked away with a tight smile. “So you knew, too?”

“Yes. I think I realised it already at the funeral how smitten you were with Hugh. And Hugh didn’t exactly do a better job at hiding his own interest.”

“Wow...” Hugh said and swallowed. “Families do take you by surprise sometimes.”

“Am I the only one who doesn’t know?” Diana asked, positively looking taken aback.

“You know now. We live together. Has been for a couple of months... Three- whatever.”

“And Sarah?”

“Sarah knows,” Emma contributed.

“Sarah knows. So you sneaky bastards knew all the time?” Tom said, feeling robbed of the momentum just like Hugh had when they visited his family.

“Would you rather we disapproved?”

“I’m not sure I approve...”

“Mum, it’s not a big deal,” Emma said.

A little out of it, Tom laughed and got up. “I need some fresh air. I’m seriously not equipped to this kind of drama.”

“Says the drama student,” Emma said and watched him leave the room. She got up and went after him.

Diana sat stiffly in her chair. “Well!” she exclaimed but had no idea what to say to Hugh who was equally clueless.

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“Tom?” Emma said and found her brother in the garden.

“Em,” Tom said and bent to pick up a small broken branch.

“I think it’s terrific.”

“I think it sucks,” Tom said. 

“She’ll come around. There’s just too much anger still, and throwing Hugh into the mix is not therapeutic at the moment. Just more fuel.”

“Well, after the anger stage, I’m sure she’ll fell different,” Tom said.

“Yes. I’m sure she will. She needs time. This is not easy for her. I’m sure it’s not easy for Hugh’s mum either. After all, Miss Dancy was with Dad in the end.”

“No. She never visited him in the hospital.”

“Oh... well, you know what I mean.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. It really means a lot to me that you understand.”

“How did it go with his folks?”

“It was very easy. They already had their suspicions so it was more a question of us verifying that they were right!”

“Yeah well. You know mum loves you. Hugh is very lovable so I cannot imagine she won’t be happy for you, once she’s done working out her grief about dad.”

“Perhaps we did spring this on to her too soon.”

“She’ll be fine. She’s tough.”

Tom smiled and kissed Emma’s cheek. Together they went inside to check on how their mum and Hugh had handled themselves in their absence.

Hugh got out of the sofa the second Tom and Emma came back.

“Ready to go?” Tom asked carefully and darted a look at his mother, who looked like her limit had been reached, too.

“I think we should. Thanks for your hospitality, Mrs. Hiddleston.”

Diana just smiled looking relieved. “Yes. Pleasure was all mine. Tom... I’ll invite you both over in a while when I’ve sorted out stuff in my head.” She smiled apologetically at Hugh. “Later then. Excuse me if I don't see you out.”

Tom quickly came over and kissed her cheek followed by a hug. “I’ll call you, mum. Perhaps it’s easier to talk about some of this over the phone.”

“No, it’s fine... but yes. Do call me anyway, Tom.”

“Bye Emma,” Hugh said and smiled when the younger sister offered him a hug instead of just a handshake.

Outside in the street, they quickly located the car and got in. Sitting shell-shocked for a moment, Tom said, “That went better than expected.”

“Yes. You could say that. Now, I don't really care what the rest of the world thinks of our special kind of relationship, all though it won’t be my opening line in conversation, mind you.”

“Nor mine,” Tom agreed and exhaled deeply. It felt like he hadn’t breathed at all during their visit.

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"So..." Rachel asked and pulled a lock of hair behind her ear.

Hugh smiled uneasily and scratched his head. The two of them had just finished filming a rather hot sex scene in ‘Tempo’, and he felt the telltale attraction she poured all over him. They were back in make-up and sat in separate chairs being pampered for another scene.

"I'm not really available, no," he said.

"But you’re not really attached either?" she assumed.

"I'm not available!" Hugh repeated and looked sideways at her.

"I like your British accent. Makes me all _weak_ in the knees," she said.

"You're not listening, are you?" Hugh said and smiled wryly.

"What do you mean?" she asked coyly.

"You're not interested in hearing what I’m saying. ‘No’ is not a variable for you. I'm not available." What was wrong with his co-stars nowadays? He refused to believe he was so desirable that at least one co-star lusted after him in every movie he filmed.

"Damn..." she said and got up as she was done in that moment anyway. "Is it Melanie?"

"No..." Hugh laughed and got up, too. "Could you at least be realistic?"

"You don’t think she’s attractive?”

“That’s not the point,” Hugh said. “And she’s twenty years older than me and married to somebody else.”

“Then you're in one of those open relationships that allow adultery?"

"I'm a monogamist - _when_ I'm in a relationship."

Rachel smiled and frowned. "So you’re not interested?"

Hugh leaned forward and looked her in the eyes. "If I hadn't been involved already, then yes... I would have been interested."

"What's she like?"

Hugh bid her to come closer and he whispered in her ear, "He's very kind. Very funny. Very sexy, and occasionally, I moan out loud when I fantasize about sucking his huge dick when we're not in the same room..."

Rachel's pupils dilated by the images appearing in her pretty little head. "Oh wow... you're gay?" she finally whispered back.

"Bi."

"Gives you more people to choose from."

"Not really. One tends to have a preference that doesn't get wider just because one is bi."

"Oh... but I’m your type?"

Hugh laughed and they continued to wardrobe. "You're very cute when you work your charm.”

"Is he in the business?"

"No. He's not,” Hugh replied, because her next question would be what Tom’s name was.

"Can't believe you're taken. Will you marry him?"

"You're just supposed to say that. Look Rachel," Hugh said. "You're incredibly sweet. I think you're beautiful and have that perfect dash of girlish sweetness I'd totally go for... if I was available. But I love my sweetheart back home in London - so sorry but no chance."

He left her to pout as he was called back to the set.

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“So... this unreal boyfriend of yours is totally paying your rent now?” Ben asked one afternoon after rehearsals for ‘Le Morte D’Arthur’, the last production of spring season. Tom was portraying Canterbury whereas Ben had the double part of Arthur/ Dynadan.

Tom smiled smugly. “Yeah... well, we’re both chipping in for rent but he does pay the most.”

Ben sighed. “How I wish I had a smashingly hot ‘it’ boyfriend who just paid everything,” he said and dramatically whipped his arms to the sides.

“He doesn’t pay for everything,” Tom said and bit into an apple. “He’s well on to becoming established. Making more money. Scripts are piling up at home. Unfortunately none of the parts are for me. I feel...”

“Tom,” Ben said and put his arm around Tom’s shoulder. “There’ll be parts for you, too. As soon as you’re out of here in two years time... you won’t be left alone for a moment. The phone won’t stop ringing. You’ll be the guy directors didn’t know they were looking for.”

Tom laughed and smiled at him. “Yeah.”

“Wanna shag tonight?” Ben whispered. “James is coming over.”

Tom shook his head and got up. “I’m not into that anymore. Hugh gives me all the dick I can handle.”

Ben looked excited and disappointed at the same time. Then he laughed and made a rude gesture. “You could both come over!!”

“Can’t. Hugh’s in the States filming.”

“Oh... that does make it impossible. What a pity. But then he’s not around to shag you silly,” Ben realised.

“I’ll tell him you invited us. You never know if he’ll do it.”

“Would you do it... if he said yes?”

“That would depend on what he feels about the subject," Tom winked.

Ben smiled. “That means there is still hope. Luv you, darling.”

“Yeah, you, too, baby. Give James my love,” Tom said and kissed Ben’s lips before he sauntered away with a goofy smile on his lips.

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Epilogue

 

2013

“When would they arrive?” Tom asked, as he rushed by Hugh carrying a stack of unfolded laundry.

“Relax, Tom,” Hugh laughed and grabbed his boyfriend around the neck and pulled him backwards in his direction.

Tom laughed and dropped the stack of clothes. “All right. What?” he asked.

“They’ll be here when they’re ready. They didn’t know when they’d be done for the day. They filmed all last night, so they expected to come over in the afternoon.”

“Two days?”

“Yeah. For two days.”

“You’re ready for this?”

“Well...” Hugh shrugged. “It’s not as if we actually invited them over for a foursome specifically.”

Tom smiled and then he tutted. “And you’re naïve. You’ve been thinking about it all day. I know you.”

“Tom,” Hugh warned him lifting a finger.

“What, love?” Tom said and crossed his arms over his chest. “Oh, you look magnificent when you chastise me, darling.”

Hugh smiled and stepped into Tom’s space. “I crush so hard on you right now,” he said and gulped by the arousal Tom still after ten years flared inside him within a second.

Grabbing Hugh, Tom kissed him hungrily and they stood magnetised by each other, connected by the lips, and moaned lustfully. “How I love thee...” Tom whispered against Hugh’s moist lips.

“Save Bill for later,” Hugh said and pushed at Tom. “I think I hear their car.”

“Oh...” Tom said and turned to look out of the window. “And so they arrived. How exciting.” He reached down to adjust his prominent hard on. “What a welcoming they’re in for.”

Since Tom officially received the deed to the cottage in 2003, the two lovers had spent a huge amount of time and money to restore their granddad’s old cottage. Family had lent a hand occasionally and for the last four years, Tom and Hugh had been living there together in between filming abroad. 

They had never outed themselves officially, but it was noticed by the media when they began to show up as each other’s dates when one of them had a premiere to attend. Due to the terrific work from their press agent Luke Windsor, they were never questioned about each other in talk shows. And they hoped they never would. The last thing they wanted was to lie about each other, but one question usually led to another and, before they knew it, the real connection between them other than being boyfriends would come out. Their careers and personal lives really couldn’t afford that to happen.

Hugh had been intrigued by Tom’s sexual appetite. He’d never had so much sex in his life like in the first year of their relationship. He was worried at some point that he’d developed an unhealthy addiction to sex because Tom was on his mind always. Moreover, he struggled containing a constant hard on for hours a day in periods of abstinence when they were in different continents. Sometimes his hand was not enough, and sex toys just turned him off when he needed Tom’s body. 

They made a deal.

Tom gave him permission to shag whomever he fancied while he was away - as long as he gave an account on every single detail when he got home. To Tom’s delight, Hugh did gladly. Likewise, Tom got the same permission with the same terms and, to their surprise; their relationship did become an open one.

Shortly after, the door bell was pulled and the Brits smoothed their mussed curls in place before Tom opened the door wide.

“Welcome to Cornwall!” he said and smiled wolfishly at the two dashingly handsome visitors waiting outside.

“Shitttt...” Reeve Carney said and instinctively grabbed for purchase behind him. “Are you for real?" he whispered worriedly at the tall fellow close up against him, "You never told me we were visiting Loki and Will Graham! I might have some issues about this!”

Josh just smiled secretively at Reeve and stepped inside a house he knew very well.

Fin

24th of June 2014

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed the story.


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